Sunday 25 October 2009

Bring It On - The Guilty Pleasure

Brilliant!!! From the opening song to the final credits. I love this movie. Bold! Bright! Brash! A non stop laugh fest with plenty of other bonuses on the way. Of course this may be a view held only by me and spotty teenagers, but I don't care cos it's great. It never takes itself seriously (unlike another of my favourites - Stomp The Yard - which I also piss myself at every watch) and that's why I find it sooo funny. Everyone must have had painful faces at the end of this as they have to keep that fake smile on the entire film. My jaws were aching for sure. Watch it you losers!!!!!

Man With The Screaming Brain - Bruce is back in the room

After the disaster that was Alien Apocalypse I decided to site through another of The Mighty Bruce *TM movies. Phew!!! This was more like it. B movie campeness from the Master of such things. The laughs were present this time and the story flowed from A to B in harmony. Nudge Nudge Wink Wink. Love It!!!

Of course not all of you will think this and will probably dismiss it as Crap! So, for the undecided, watch the trailer and go from there.


Alien Apocalypse - The Dream is Over

Words cannot describe how bad this is. Even the almighty Bruce cannot save it. The poster is probably the best thing about the movie.

Sunday 18 October 2009

Youngblood - The Home of the Grave


Popped out on Saturday night to see The Bristol Pitbulls. Pro Ice Hockey returns to Bristol for the first time in 16 years apparently. Always liked to watch and PlayStation a bit of NHL over the years so it was nice to be able to see a local game of this fantastic sport.

The Pitbulls were playing the Cardiff Satans (I kid you not, nice peeps the Welsh) and so we turned up about 30 minutes before Face off. Advised by the ticket lady to sit behind the goal for the best view. Hmmm, this is Bristol Ice rink. It's the only view and even this one isn't much cop. Anyway watching the Satans warm up was the most terrifying experience of recent times. I know that the puck does leave the rink from time to time during a match. But this is rare and usually your only watching one puck at a time. In warm up it's a about 30 of them and as with Hockey, an uncontrolled hit can send that missile anywhere. When the first puck landed by my feet I was on my guard. A few of their players even aimed a couple over the barriers (nice peeps the Welsh). Anyway no injuries.

The game itself though is top notch to watch in the flesh. Fast, committed, violent. It's all of these things and more and Bristol should be glad they have a team to watch. They also won which was a bonus. A pretty tight and nervy game, with tensions rising in both teams. Good to see a bit of fighting before the end as well. That's what Ice Hockey is all about.

Good value as well at £6 for adults and £3 for kids. That's about 3 hours entertainment. Local Football could learn something. Of course how long it will last in Bristol is down to support I think. There were enough people in to create an atmosphere but I fail to see how far the sport can go in Bristol. Bristol Ice Rink you see is a shit hole. If you haven't been there for about 30 years then there is no need to get nostalgic about the place. It is exactly the same with 30 more years of wear and tear.

The success of any sport is based on it's support. I just don't know where anymore support will be able to sit and support in this venue. A real Shame for a city the size of Bristol. But then how many times do we say this about anything in this City. Exactly who does it cater for???

Bristol Pitbulls 1 - Bristol Ice Rink 0

Oh I didn't mention the playing of the National Anthems. People actually stood up. I didn't because it felt weird, but more importantly I don't recognise that as the English National Anthem. But another time......

Starship Troopers - You wanna live forever?

Allegations into this films political stance are numerous. Fascism, Militarism, Utopianism and Racism to name a few. Satire never seems to come up though does it. Doesn't end in ism I suppose. It's a shame that people can't just watch it as it's meant to be, a bit more innocently. A full on Battle-tastic bug splatting guts exploding adventure........with boobs! It's Verhoeven and he knows his audience. He did direct Showgirls though and that kind of ruined Saved By The Bell for me.

Scanners - That one scene doth not a film make

I really really really still wanted to like this film. In my head was that one scene that I'd paused and rewound on VHS so many times as kid. Hell, it's not like it was boobs :/. But that scene is pretty much all it is. The rest is pretty laughable. So much so that a comedy remake must be on the cards. It would work.

Hold on. Michael Ironside is in it. I love It!!!

The Departed - That Infernal Hollywood

Great Film!!! Comes off as a bit of a poor mans Goodfellas at times to me, but then this is probably to do with the music cues and maybe because of the Directors style. Hardly gonna slag off Scorcese though am I?????? Yeah. Oooooooh the undercover cop is going deep deep deep undercover. Oh god!!! He fell off the roof! No surprises are there Hollywood as anyone worth their salt had seen the original. Maybe not a reason to judge a movie but then remake it after 20 years to give us time to forget. At least Marky Mark rocks in his role as foul mouthed Copper though.

Friday 2 October 2009

Very Bad Things - Cure for The Hangover

A dark comedic masterpiece. Very dark at times. Amazed that it can even make you laugh, but then some of the comedy moments are so 'line crossing' in execution that it's not difficult as the tension has built up so much that the release is needed. Was that a good description??? Who knows. The key ingredient for me. Cameron Diaz. You know she is this self centered and determined in real life. Wouldn't want to meet her in a dark alley......or would I :)

Major league - In the comedy world

One of my favourite 80s comedy movies. Has all the right elements to stay fresh. Great actors, good humour and simple story where you know the 'freaks' will come out on top. Keep the comedy, drama and smaulch in a mix all through the film and it will stand the test. Still love watching it today. Not sure that many modern day comic movies will have me saying that in 20 years.

Wolf Creek - I taut I saw a Puddy Tat

Sadistic, violent and unnecessarily gory is what you say when a horror film is unreal and unbelievable. Unfortunately this film is far too real and all too believable. Three tourists and one 'happy, lovable' Aussie encourage you to not quit your job and go backpacking across the Outback. If you want to be scared then watch this. I did and I'm staying put.

Natural City - Androids and Sheep

Weird Plot. Wooden Acting. Lot's of other throwaway comments. A Korean Scifi flick that is far too much like Blade Runner in story and visuals for it's own good. Hang fire on the neon and rain guys. Just because you have noodle bars in Korea, doesn't mean you can just rip the scene straight from the film.