Couples Retreat - It's puppy cradle death syndrome

A really weak film that would be average to worthless if it wasn't for the cast.  But the cast make this more than watchable.  Vince Vaughan plays VV and that's always worth a watch.  Jason Bateman is a comic genius and with his on screen partner, Kristen Bell, we have the modern day couple to die for. Jon Favreau and Jean Reno add their skills to the mix as well.  In fact, everyone is on form.

The star of the show though is Peter Serafinowicz.  Still unsure if he's a genius or a complete dick, but in this he's definitely the evil genius. 

Will probably be panned for saying it , but I loved it.

IMDb link

I love you Beth Cooper - Love is Blind

A high School comedy Directed by Chris Columbus.  Should be a shoe in for laughs then.

In my mind the director  is a guarantee stamp like John Hughes, a guaranteed teen comedy will be delivered.  My mind must be lost as the man that gave us Home Alone 1&2 also bought us the heavily overrated-budgeted-marketed Harry Potter movies and little else.

The comic timing and the film editing is way off.  Whether that's the director, his second string team of actors or a combination of both, I don't know.  What I do know, is that a lot of the ideas and comedy on show SHOULD be funny but it isn't.  A real shame. 

IMDb Link

DOA: Dead or Alive - WARNING: This motion picture does not contain explicit portrayals of violence; sex; violent sex; sexual violence; clowns and violent scenes of violent excess, so is definitely suitable for all audiences.

Remember the bit about watching films in HD when they are shown. Well that's my excuse for watching this also. It's not terrible and it doesn't take itself seriously at all. It has some cool and equally ropey fight scenes and sticks in three scantily clad maidens to up the interest for the Teenage boy audience. Surely no other excuse for the volleyball scene????

Think of it as a poor mans Charlie's Angels (The Movie Remakes) if such a thing can be achieved and just take it or leave it.

Predator - M134 when you absolutely positively have to kill every mutha fucker in the jungle, accept no substitute.

Arnie sets off on a Jungle hunt with Jessie Ventura and Apollo Creed and some other mates to hunt down the most quintessential badass alien that has ever been created. Couple this with some awesome 80's scripted dialogue, a thunderous score from Silvestri and the meanest (hand)gun ever shown on screen in and you get one of the greatest sci-fi actioners created.

Trivia - Arnold is displaying enlightenment at the fact that he can't be seen because he is covered in clay. Man that guy can act.

First Blood - Back Home

Sly's best film? You decide

What it is, is a fantastic action movie with a little more depth and realism than it gets credit for. John Rambo, Vietnam vet, snaps when the local law enforcement get a little too heavy.  What ensues is Action movie gold.

The International - The World's Local Bank

Clive Owen, hereon referred to as 'The Plank' (a bit harsh as this is probably his least wooden performance) stars as a Interpol agent relentlessly investigating a huge banking organisation. Story reminds me a lot of Lord of War with Nic Cage,  because of the nod to the fact that Big Business runs and influences the whole world.

Set to a European back drop, this conspiracy thriller was always going to draw comparison to The Bourne trilogy of films. A shame, as if you do compare it then it will come up well short. The fast passed action and stylised editing of those films is not even attempted in this brooding thriller. Fixed cam landscapes a plenty on view in what is an engaging and thought provoking journey across the globe.
A nod to older movies and styles on show here and long may such things continue. You have to love the shoot out in the museum as well. It is stunning.

AVP: Requiem - ....and dark doesn't mean good, it means I can't see what the fudge is going on.....

Dark, plot-less, careless and pointless

AVP - The Games Master

As with Transformers, just having two sets of awesome bad guys kick the shit out of each other is not allowed. As is releasing what would be an awesome 30 minute flick in the pictures. So we have to mix in some human element and plotted story.

Paul WS Anderson gets good action fodder in his flick and knows his audience so this is simple stuff. TBF if it wasn't for the PG13 rating restricting the gore and the, let's be honest, pretty ropey first face off for the two protagonists then this is a pretty great attempt as far as shallow action movies go.
Mind you, I've seen it three times now, so it might be a good time to retire it from viewing. Nah can't do that. Colin Salmon and Henriksen being in this will always make me think it's worth another go.

Predators - Danger! Danger! Will Robinson

An action reboot and apparent sequel to the first Predator movie gets that billing for no apparent reason. Averagely dull action stars and too much of the bad stuff from King Kong and The Mist for me. You know, stupid CGI alien stuff.

Thing is, despite Brody being broody, Fishburne being great/fat and the rest being ok fodder. It just tries too hard. It seems an irrelevance to put these characters in various states of confusion when the majority of the viewers know what's coming. You just get no involvement or connection to their plight.

No bombastic score. No second half urgency. Laurence Fishburne is Tim Robbins in War of the Worlds. And a predictable seen it coming a mile off so a real shame it wasn't worth waiting for samurai scene.

Let Down. No better, but no worse than AVP, albeit for different reasons.

Predator 2 - It has not been a nice day

Take the first movie, move the shoot to an easier location to work in and crack on with making sequels the way they are supposed to be made. Set up the plot, kill off the characters and end with a massive chase/hunt.

Get some good action actors (Glover, Paxton, Bussey), Some bad un's (most of the rest) and some OTT ones (hey the mighty Paxton again :)) and remember that it's the man in the suit and the awesome score that really make this franchise. You'll be onto a winner.
Some shocking delivered lines from the Hispanic cops does not distract from the fact that this is the second best Predator movie.

Date Movie - The curse of technology

I watch a lot crap purely because I have HD Sky and tend to record anything in Hi Def.  I hate poor spoofs and especially spoofs that try and spoof comedy :?  Spoofs that are not even funny are particularly pointless.

IMDb Link 

Final Destination - It's a one-way ticket to a madman's situation

The first and second best of the three films I have seen from this four piece saga. It still holds up well after several repeat viewing's because there is just so much going on in the background. The books, pictures on the walls, songs, names.....it goes on and on. And to top that it's just a well polished horror film with plenty of inventive death scenes of incredible length and detail. How number two managed to improve on this I don't know, but I think like here, they just new what worked. 


There are so many great scenes to get through. And all of them keep you gripped and guessing and far enough onto the edge of your seat to jump out of your skin at several points. They nailed this movie, pure and simple. And that ending get's me every time.

Kick Ass - The Non Conformist Genre Genre

Like Zombieland before it, this film has reminded me what I love about movies. Both these films have thrown a curve ball at their respective genres reminding us that films don't need to fit hoes for pigeons.

In simple terms, kick ass is kick ass. It has somehow managed to blend the modern American teen humour with a storyline, a dramatised superhero movie, some blood thirsty action and plenty of Irony. Hell it even gets a stupendous performance from Nic Cage. And this is a man who has sat firmly on my avoid radar for a long long time.

The movie is amazing. If they had made this in Asia then critics would have hailed it's existence as pure genius. And then firmly slated Western cinema for not being able to do the same. Well we did the same people and it didn't need to be half as quirky and mind bending as those crazy Japanese Korean fellows ;)

I for one cannot wait to watch this again.

IMDb Link

'The Expendables' Trailer HD

It's arrived. Nothing can ruin my anticipation for this Movie.

Lost - It was the dawn of the third age of mankind

Something has been bothering me about Lost.  It's not the series as it's one of the best TV shows ever (not as good as BSG). It's not the ending as I thought it was a fantastic ending to a TV Show.  So many shows don't end.  So many shows drag themselves on for far too long and when they finally do end they don't tell you anything (X Files). It's not even the hundreds of poor SKY One Lost exclusive shows which are some of the poorest efforts of TV ever.  Iain Lee, what happened??......

Nope, It's the CGI in the last season.  Some of the worse I've seen in a TV show.  Where did the budget go.  Anything in the water was like someone had just switched over to a cartoon.  It would give Primeval a run for its money in the 'you know it's not real so we're not even going to try' stakes.  Bizarre....