Thursday 30 October 2008

Taken - French pissing off the CIA, French pissing off the USA-A-A-A-A


Luc Besson by numbers, but not a bad thing. The smaltz stuff is a bit Face Off but the rest is class. Liam Neeson took some lessons from Bourne and Bauer, left the force behind and turned into one bad ass mother. Don't mess with him 'cause he will take you down, take you down to chinatown.

Monday 27 October 2008

The Incredible Hulk - Merely credible


I don't know why people think this is better than Ang Lee's effort? It just doesn't have the impact or scale of the first. The Hulk is big and yet the framing contains him. We have the same characters and yet a completley different cast. Ed Norton is off form and Tim Roth is laughable. Maybe I'm not as shallow as I thought. Still a reasonable effort though and the beautiful Liv Tyler should be enough to keep your attention. Ahh there we go..

Saturday 25 October 2008

The Happening - Not the place to be



Mmmmmmm.Night Shamalamadingdong decided that the best way to make his films look great again is to make a shite one first. It almost worked except this is only marginally better than Lady in the Water. Trade mark visuals, sets, a good idea and genuinely tense until Marky Mark appears on screen or opens his mouth. Then you just want to laugh. At least his next film will be a stormer. Or the next one.......

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0949731/

Hostel:Part II - Stayed in a worse B&B before


They call it ' Torture Porn' I think. Well its torturous, but just on your energy to watch movies. Awful. Exactly like the first, but without the originality, obviously. Don't bother, because Saw does it better and there are less breasts in this one.

Monday 20 October 2008

So little time - So much to do



So, we have the PS3, we have GTAIV we have PES 09, when will I find time to watch films now???? Oh yes, and must make time to meet women.

Sunday 19 October 2008

Jarhead - War, It's boring and there is no bugle program! You sizzle dick motherfucker!


'This is my rifle, there are many like it but this one is mine'....hang on wrong film. But this is a Platoon or FMJ for the next generation. Brilliantly helmed by Sam M again (the lucky B) and the cinematography is fantastic. Stunning - 'All the rest is Bullshit.'

Death Race - A race to the death.


It's a PWS Anderson and Statham collaborartion, so we're not talking highbrow entertainment. A back to basics action movie that all action movie fans should love. Unless you've seen the Original and then you will get all highbrow on someones' ass. But you will never see me slag off a Statham film.

Little Miss Sunshine - Americans actually do this to their kids


As said. Finally got around to this one and it is very funny. But also disturbing as Americans really hold these kiddy pageants. But enough, the jokes keep coming at you and the whole film is a bit like a Wes Anderson picture, right down to the slo-mo. And as for granpa - gotta get that young pussy when your young else you're looking at a 3 to 5 stretch.