Saturday, 21 March 2009

Watchmen - Even a stopped clock tells the right time twice a day!

I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in the rain. Time to die.

Wow! Blown away. Visually stunning, I knew it would be. Zack is the new master. Every thing looks great and the story flows well. It's no Batman, but it is just as low down dirty deeds done cheap. The way heroes should be, 'Super' or otherwise. It may not be for every ones liking but I think this movie will still be being talked about in decades to come. Do you like it? They will whisper 'Yes!'

Monday, 16 March 2009

Death Sentence - Hey pig piggy pig pig pig all of my fears came true

I know that in my head there are loads of ideas just waiting to be put onto celluloid. I know they are influenced heavily by all the films I have seen, all the books I have read. I know the images, I know the camera tricks, I know the sound cuts, the shocks, the style. I also know that even though I would think it was amazing, If I sat back and re-evaluated would be shit. Maybe, just maybe, they should have done that with this.

Tuesday, 10 March 2009

Slither - Rape my mind and smell the poppies

These films are few and far between nowadays. Eight Legged Freaks, springs to mind as a similar example. I'm sure there were more when I was a kid. Perhaps I should start going back to the video store. Maybe there are not as many that look as good as this. Performs within it's budget and audience and that's what makes it work. It's pretty gruesome in places as well so you don't know whether to laugh or be sick. Not sure if I like it or love it but I have seen it three times now so, Meh!!!!

Sunday, 8 March 2009

Resident Evil : Extinction - Reuse - Recycle - Regurgitate

I love apocalyptic movies and I love zombie movies. I wanted to call this Zombilyptic, but I guess they have always been a combined genre any way. Especially those of the great George. This one cemented that in so many stolen ways. T2, Mad Max, Alien 4, Planet of the apes - the list is endless. Better than the second, not as good as the first, just well produced shallow cinema. The kind I adore. I mean it was always gonna be good and then Ali Larter turned up to sweeten the deal.

Ocean's Thirteen - Vegas Two Times

The boys are back in Vegas after their Euro trip. Soderburgh tries to recapture the original feel, but he's on a hiding to nothing. They say to 'never go back' and they say it for a reason. Still looks great and plays great and if that's what you like about the Danny Ocean capers then this won't disappoint. And give it a bit of respect in the fact that it doesn't hide it's origins or intentions. I for one love seeing this cast in action and is a shame we probably wont see anymore. No Julia Roberts I can cope with, but no Bernie Mac. No way.

Saturday, 7 March 2009

Resident Evil:Apocalypse - Shoot someone in the head

More chicks with guns. Starts at full speed with quick edits and flashbacks. And the shot of the Black SUVs cruising along was always gonna look great. Alas, it soon descends into kind of a mess. Poorly scripted and acted with some terrible direction of action scenes. Not sure why as the helmer has/had pedigree for this sort of thing. The Bad Taste-esq bad guy would only work in a Peter Jackson ironic way and I didn't spot any. But as I said at the start 'Chicks With Guns', so my shallow needs are met.

Tuesday, 3 March 2009

Resident Evil - Alice! What's the matter?

Know the game, don't know the game?? Either way it's a great movie. Look. It's Milla in a tight red dress, showing a lot of leg and kicking a lot of ass. It's also a zombie movie, and I love zombie movies. Stylish video game fodder handled superbly by PWS Anderson with a great soundtrack to boot. You'll jump and scream plus at the end you get Millas best outfit since The Fifth Element. schwiiiing :) and I haven't even mentioned Michelle Rodriguez. But it's more than just a slobber fest.

Sunday, 1 March 2009

You, Me and Dupree - Looking for it's....'Ness'

Another Owen Wilson vehicle. He's a bit like 80's Tom Cruise as you know what you're gonna get. Laid back and honest and all those oh so hilarious events that will occur because of him. Matt Dillon always comes across as his 'Something about Mary' character when he plays comedy to me. Not a bad thing, but again no surprises. Kate looks great but doesn't really do much. But Seth Rogen adds something. Sounds a bit like a recipe.

Role Models - Not good comedy ones though

OK, so it's not that bad. But it is the kind of run of the mill comedy that will make you laugh once, no repeat viewings. You know, like Police Academy sequels. It's saved by the actors really as they are all good, and the presence of 'McLovin' is a bonus indeed. The best bits are the bizarre dialogue exchanges that Wheeler and Danny have with Gayle Sweeny. Priceless. Other than that it can be a bit too feel good without the payoff.