Date Movie - The curse of technology

I watch a lot crap purely because I have HD Sky and tend to record anything in Hi Def.  I hate poor spoofs and especially spoofs that try and spoof comedy :?  Spoofs that are not even funny are particularly pointless.

IMDb Link 

Final Destination - It's a one-way ticket to a madman's situation

The first and second best of the three films I have seen from this four piece saga. It still holds up well after several repeat viewing's because there is just so much going on in the background. The books, pictures on the walls, songs, names.....it goes on and on. And to top that it's just a well polished horror film with plenty of inventive death scenes of incredible length and detail. How number two managed to improve on this I don't know, but I think like here, they just new what worked. 


There are so many great scenes to get through. And all of them keep you gripped and guessing and far enough onto the edge of your seat to jump out of your skin at several points. They nailed this movie, pure and simple. And that ending get's me every time.

Kick Ass - The Non Conformist Genre Genre

Like Zombieland before it, this film has reminded me what I love about movies. Both these films have thrown a curve ball at their respective genres reminding us that films don't need to fit hoes for pigeons.

In simple terms, kick ass is kick ass. It has somehow managed to blend the modern American teen humour with a storyline, a dramatised superhero movie, some blood thirsty action and plenty of Irony. Hell it even gets a stupendous performance from Nic Cage. And this is a man who has sat firmly on my avoid radar for a long long time.

The movie is amazing. If they had made this in Asia then critics would have hailed it's existence as pure genius. And then firmly slated Western cinema for not being able to do the same. Well we did the same people and it didn't need to be half as quirky and mind bending as those crazy Japanese Korean fellows ;)

I for one cannot wait to watch this again.

IMDb Link

'The Expendables' Trailer HD

It's arrived. Nothing can ruin my anticipation for this Movie.

Lost - It was the dawn of the third age of mankind

Something has been bothering me about Lost.  It's not the series as it's one of the best TV shows ever (not as good as BSG). It's not the ending as I thought it was a fantastic ending to a TV Show.  So many shows don't end.  So many shows drag themselves on for far too long and when they finally do end they don't tell you anything (X Files). It's not even the hundreds of poor SKY One Lost exclusive shows which are some of the poorest efforts of TV ever.  Iain Lee, what happened??......

Nope, It's the CGI in the last season.  Some of the worse I've seen in a TV show.  Where did the budget go.  Anything in the water was like someone had just switched over to a cartoon.  It would give Primeval a run for its money in the 'you know it's not real so we're not even going to try' stakes.  Bizarre....  

Lords Of Dogtown - Let's go Space Truckin'

Disenfranchised 'yoofs' take skateboarding to a new level in this bio-pic about the explosion of the sport in 70s US of A. How annoying are these guys. They live in a dump on the sunny coast, but rather than stick to surfing they go for skateboarding. Not only that, they get to practice and highlight their talents by illegally skating in the empty pools of local residents. Hardly fair is it.

Skateboarding should be an Urban jungle pursuit. Dirty Meaders hardly get the choice to take up surfing do they. Being able to ride the Severn bore once a year can't really count. To make things worse, they don't even get the chance to practice in swimming pools. The residents of Sneyd Park and Stoke Bishop would never empty their green slime pools even though we only get sunshine for about 4 weeks a year........

.....This is a great film. Easy to sit down and watch with a beer and take in the images and the great 70's soundtrack. Why??? Because I want their life of chilled out hassle free existence in the sun or I want to sit down with a beer and a movie with some 70's rock. Heath Ledgers' best film (until I find another) especially highlighted by his scene set against Maggie May (Awesome).

 IMDb
Lords of Dogtown (Unrated Extended Cut) 

Club Dread - Broken Lizards Club Dread no less

Strange one this. I assume Broken Lizard is a comedy troupe that got together for this feature. They're quite a funny bunch but the film is disjointed. The biggest problem is trying to make a comedy horror from a slasher flick. Not needed, it's already a comedy genre in it's own right. All in all, the characters are good, but the film just drags. On the plus side, there is plenty of unnecessary flesh on show......

Oh and the Legend that is BILL PAXTON as well :)

IMDb
Club Dread (Unrated Extended Edition) 

Lake Placid - Thankyou for being a friend

Lake Placid is a tale of a man eating monster that terrorises the local lake eating tourists and anyone that cares to turn up.

At least that's the plot....

The result is very different. It's effectively a horror comedy with the narrative being nothing more than a excuse for a group of people to engage in some sarcastic exchanges. The Horror element doesn't work in the slightest but the film is no worse for it. The only thing missing is Nathan Fillion. Did he base his career on this film????

IMDb
Lake Placid (Widescreen Edition) 

Carlitos's Way - She's On Fire

Brian de Palma and Al Pacino + Scarface. Right??? Nope, it can also Be Carlito's way. But Carlito'sWay is no Scarface. Yep it's good, but not Scarface. In fact, scrap that, because at times it is like Scarface. The camera work, the dialogue, the movement. But herein lies the problem. It's the same director, it's the same lead and although not the same story it is a similar genre of crime. Too many similarities pointing to the better movie for me. If I could offer you a reason to watch, it would simple be that it is a great film. Just make sure you devote a clear two hours to view it and you clear you memory of Scarface beforehand.

IMDb
Carlito's Way [Blu-ray] 

Iron Man - Heavy boots of lead fills his victims full of dread

Hit my second viewing of Iron Man over the weekend and am still left bewildered by the hype that this movie gets from my popcorn loving friends. In the modern world of Superhero summers, it just feels like more of the same. It follows the same establishing line of all the origin movies and because of that it might as well BE the same movie.

There seems little you can do with a Marvel movie, it's eternally trapped in a set of rules like Disney. You can rarely break enough of these rules without falling into a trap. Namely turn into a camp kids movie like Fantastic Four or alienate those that don't want to think like Batman Begins or Hulk. I suppose Iron Man sits nicely in the middle like Spider-man or X-men. Visual enough and clever enough and adult enough to appeal to everyone. But that said, it's still a franchise setting movie that has to drop in an obligatory appearance for Stan Lee (A flawed genius who knows what he likes and it ain't a lot of variety) and so never challenges the grey matter or comes close to surprising you.

Iron Man has a great soundtrack, some great set pieces and is better acted than most, but give me Blade or Hellboy any day of the week.

IMDb
Iron Man (Ultimate Two-Disc Edition + BD Live) [Blu-ray] 

Zu Warriors from the Magic Mountain - Loses a little something in the translation ....maybe

Eh?????????

Take the worse episode of Monkey you ever saw, add the fact that your not a kid anymore and you never saw this when you were and then multiply by the fact that you never even liked Big Trouble in Little China let alone foreign cinema. Then decide if you want to watch this.

For students of Asian cinema only.

IMDb
Zu - Warriors From the Magic Mountain 

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus - Terry & Jude

This film is probably best known for being the film that Heath Ledger was in the middle of making when he died.  It was probably the only thing left that could happen to film maker Terry Gilliam to scupper his latest movie.  Okay, it was a worse deal for Heath, but Gilliam really does get a bum deal with his visionary movies.  He seems like a nice guy, but I can only assume he's a complete bastard as karma is clearly not this mans friend. Read up on it.

I'm a fan though.  Ever since his crazy animation work in Monty Python caught my eye as a kid.  And It's transferred to all his films, Time Bandits, 12 Monkeys, The Fisher King (easily gets into my Top Ten films ever every time), Brazil.  The man is a visionary genius who makes films that live long in the memory but are very much off base.

This film is no different than the rest. It's instantly recognisable as his work. There is a lot going on, the characters are uniquely Gilliam, it's got all his crazy camera angles, the Sets are messy and detailed and the story is a dream like fantasy straight from the pages of child's book (well the kind of book that got released in 60s and 70s before the Nanny State got involved).

 

It's interesting to think how this film would have panned out if Heath hadn't died.  I'm not sure if re-writes were required or if the addition of Johnny Depp, Jude Law and Colin Farrell as the same character in a fantasy world just slotted in with less make up required.  Will probably make a good making off to match Lost in La Mancha.  It seems to work naturally anyway.

But as with all his work, and like The Matrix, it can't be explained, you have to experience it for yourself.  This one especially as I will have to watch at least once more before I can figure out what was going on.  

Aliens - I say we grease this rat-fuck son of a bitch right now!

So if you have to go to the Queen to ask to form a government, can she then step in when you start fucking up the country and blow your ass outta town???  We may have to rely on someone else.

"Up and to the left"  

Too Soon???

The Taking of Pelham 123 - To the swingers and the roustabouts and the carnivore queen

I never thought that the words 'Underwhelmed' and 'Tony Scott' could go together. But it appears that they can. He is one of my favourite directors with movies such as 'Enemy of the State', 'Spy Game', 'Last Boy Scout' and 'Man on Fire' to name a few. Yeah he's a stylised director with his trademark blind light and his ever increasing MTV hyperkinetic editing. But his films are good. It seems though that with this remake he has ran out of steam.

It contains all of his said TM's, but it all comes across as more of the same. It isn't helped by everyone else seemingly going through the motions as well. Washington's perfect teeth everyday joe churning out the same old stuff. Travolta's camp bad guy that we've seen far too many times before and were never really scared of in the first place (although never with such unbelievable make-up, and that includes Battlefield Earth). And there's more New Yawking than you saw in Die Hard with a Vengeance.

So there you have it. A superb high octane thriller for those of you that have never seen any similar work from these three power hitters before. They should be less proud of themselves though as it appears they were just fulfilling contract obligations.

Dinosaur - No Jurasic Park

A turn of the century movie from the Disney studio, that along with Treasure Planet, Atlantis, Tarzan and the likes, I have never watched because I am probably too old. But seeing as I got hold of the Blu Ray in a cheap 2for1 deal I decided to give up 80 mins of a Saturday morning.

And I'm glad I did. I'm a Disney convert. 6 times visitor to their various theme parks/worlds doesn't lie. And this movie is pure Disney. Ignore the genius of the Pixar movies and get down to the nitty gritty of Disney. Child separated from family, finds new family, big event will attempt to break up family, but we all live happily ever after. Hell, it's jungle book without the songs. Actually that astounded me. As a kid I loved most Disney movies but Jungle book aside I rarely liked the songs. They annoyed me. Toy Story 2 just misses out on ultimate movie status because of Jessie's song. Bleugh!!!!!

So what we have here is a fantastically animated (against Live action backdrops but really, really looks great) traditional Disney movie minus the songs. I think this is because the film was not even supposed to have dialogue. In fact when I saw the trailers years ago, I assumed this was the case. It's worth a watch if you like Disney and the soundtrack will have you chomping at the bit to get back to the happiest place on earth. Well I am anyway :)